2.27.24 // Trust
Trust.
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So easily given, yet so easily broken.
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I am someone who trusts openly. I take pride in my ability to trust and my willingness to trust.
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I open doors (mailboxes?), friendships, work, and relationships with a level of trust that surrenders to the idea of what will happen will be the best thing for me.
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My trust is laced with optimism and curiosity.
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However, that enthusiasm to open with trust has cost me in the past. Sometimes it would cost me dollars on a contract and sometimes it could cost me a value deeply rooted in my heart and my soul.
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But, I love that part of myself- the trust- I love my want to surrender even after it cost me so much.
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So instead of taking trust away, I added something else.
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Discernment. The ability to judge well.
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I usually grimace at the idea of judgment and the demand for needing it, but I have found that a small bit of discernment can make a big difference in how I show up and my ability to continue to trust without having to pay the cost of giving trust a little too freely.
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Discernment feels tied closely to intuition too. It's an internal monitor of what feels good, who feels good, and how feels good.
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It's still an active practice I'm trying to learn, but one that feels like it will hold a big difference in my persistent ability to give trust and to keep my heart open.