9.29.20 // this is me

This is me.
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This is me and this is my first "real" hat that I bought in Colorado last year.
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I've always loved hats. I have since I was a kid. I used to insist, to my mom, that I needed to wear a hat, the bigger the hat the better. I vividly remember an Easter hat that was obnoxious with a big pink flower, that I just HAD TO wear... But, I never thought, as an adult, I could pull them off.
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I told myself I couldn't. I wasn't a cool girl like the people I saw rocking hats like this on Instagram. I wasn't skinny, didn't have flawlessly manicured hair, and I almost never put on makeup.
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But one day I found this hat. The woman at the store told me it was "my hat".
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Of course, I rolled my eyes, but deep down, I felt powerful and I felt confident, which is not a color I wear often.
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So, I bought the hat.
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However, for a while, I wouldn't wear it.
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I convinced myself that the fleeting moment of confidence was just an in-the-store instance and now, in the real world, it would never look as good. I fell back into comparison, self-judgment, and a trap of influencers and models.
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But, I love hats.
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I was going to stop myself from partaking in a trend I loved, because I thought I wasn't cool enough, riddled with fear of judgment instead of fearless confidence in myself.
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But, when do we start doing things for ourselves versus the approvals and likes of others?
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It's a slippery slope, be wary friends.
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Think deeply about what you love, what makes you confident, not what looks good on someone else, or seems "cool."
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Let's be fearlessly ourselves.
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And damnit, I bet you would look great in that hat too, so don't be afraid.