6.9.23 // No Longer Withering

I started to wither away.
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In my withering, I lost myself with the passing days, weeks, months, and eventually years as the sun slowly faded from my world. Kept hidden by your cloak of darkness that I used to find comforting, I decided to stay there even though it was costing me my own light.
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In my withering, my petals were slowly falling off long before I realized the roots I had come to know had gone bad. I tried desperately to keep the bright yellow and gold petals on my deeply discolored stem from years of self-neglect and being kept in the darkness. And while I was pulling every lever to try to save my petals, my stem, and my roots, sometimes the only option is to take the plant out of the environment that was killing it. Even if trying to save it was considered the more valiant option...
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Heartbreak, anger, and sadness, are all part of the human experience and I accept and celebrate them to the extent I can, however, I do not choose them actively and knowingly. Because the thing about choice is that I have a role in it and it is my responsibility to make the best choice with the knowledge I have.
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It is on me and me alone to save myself, my petals, my stem, and my roots.