10.10.22 // The Hvar Chapter

The Hvar Chapter.
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It's strange to be back in this beautiful place. A place where the air is thick and salty, the breeze is a bouquet of sage and cedar, and the buildings are immaculately built with shiny marble stones and pristine red roofs.
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I hadn't expected to return to this island in Croatia, with turquoise blue waters lapping its shores, but I'm damn glad I did.
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When I was here during the summer of 2021, it was one of the most intense chapters of my year abroad...
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Challenging and expansive.
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When I came here last year it was because my tourist visa had run out for the Schengen Area of Europe.
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I was supposed to fly to San Francisco two days after arriving on Hvar to go to the Italian Consulate and have my visa processed for the year. But after arriving (my suitcase full of sweaters for SF), the Consulate emailed me that they weren't accepting in-person appointments, only passports by mail. I canceled my plans and enlisted help as I shipped off my passport and then called Croatia home for many weeks...
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The temporary loss of my passport left me feeling like a caged animal. I felt like my options were slim and in the midst of being in that heady place, a lot of big life choices were surfacing.
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It was like Hvar was a storm over the open ocean that was my life. If I could weather it, I'd be stronger than I ever had been, if I didn't, I would slowly drown.
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I took a lot of blows during the storm, but it was like the wind from the storm had cleared my fuzzy mind and for the first time since arriving for my year in Europe, I saw things very clearly- imbalances in myself, my relationships, my life at large. And the storm needed to destruct in order for me to rebuild.
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Hvar was my storm and my savior. I never thought I would return to this beautiful place that contained heavy memories.
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But it turns out, I was meant to come back. Perhaps to reflect and recognize how much growth that storm spurred over the last year?
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So as I breathe the salt and cedar-filled air, it's with clear eyes, lungs, and heart. I'm able to appreciate this island for more than just its beauty, but also for it playing a leading role during a dramatic shift in my life.