10.28.20 // the wind

Sometimes, the wind blows.
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Sometimes that wind is throwing sand in your eyes, blowing hair in your mouth, pushing against you as you climb uphill.
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However, the wind is always going to blow.
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The question is, how do you feel the breeze, the billows, the gusts? How do you react?
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A few months back, I was trying to climb a beautiful mountain in colorado. Mount Sopris towers over Carbondale and she is stunning, regal, and rolling in big mountain magic.
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But, when I was on the false summit and crossing the saddle, the wind was angry. I could feel her whipping through my hair, making me shaky in my steps over the scree. Eventually, I was overwhelmed by the element and turned back. I listened to her, but I was angry and disappointed that I couldn't complete my goal. My reaction to the wind and making a safe choice was filled with bitter resentment.
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A month after that first attempt, I went back to Sopris. This time the wind was soft, gentle, and supportive. I completed my goal and made it to the Summit.
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So, in the long run, was my negative reaction that first time worth it? Was the hike down after that first attempt, which was glum and full of disappointment for not being more fearless in the aggressive wind, necessary? No.
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It feels like a lot of life is like this...
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So much of the world, your life, your day is out of your control.
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But, your reactions are the one variable you have complete control over.
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In some moments, deep moments of anger, disappointment, sadness, and insecurity, it can feel hard to control your reactions. It can feel almost impossible, so much so that you don't even realize that your emotions are in fact a reaction.
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But, learning to challenge our instinctual reactions, those emotions, is a journey worth taking.
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It is a challenging one, but a beautiful one.
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So, let the wind blow.