11.3.22 // The Fall Rain

The words I've been searching for are evading me, hiding in the dark depths of my mind.
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A stark contrast to the ever-falling rain, consistently landing on my skin and demanding my attention.
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The push and pull from what I want to what I have.
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But what if what I have is actually what I want?
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What if the rain, desperately begging for my attention is the flow and the words that I actually need...
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What if the cycle of summer shedding into fall is what I want, deep down? And perhaps the words that are hiding are the "shoulds" of expectations placed in my mind by the other- other versions of myself, other humans outside of me.
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What if the rain needs my attention because she is a mirror of my mind? A beautiful looking glass to see my truth, to slow down and feel the gentleness of Mother Nature...
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Because I am gentle and endlessly seeking the hidden words is anything but. The words of my mind are hiding because they don't need to be seen before they are ready.
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So perhaps the rain is the feeling of enjoying what is ready to be seen... and leaving what is unseen alone.