11.2.21 // Scout, I've missed you

I didn't know if you were going to be mad at me.
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I didn't know if you were going to recognize me.
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I didn't know if you would still hold the same unconditional love for me that I took for granted before our year apart.
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I didn't know, and I was so scared.
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I was scared I wouldn't be enough, that you wouldn't want to come home with me, that you wouldn't remember our adventures, the nights you licked away my tears, danced with me in the kitchen, and grounded me.
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I thought about you endlessly over the last 8 months. You were an infinite circle of thought that played in my mind.
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I'd still change song lyrics to have your name in them, I'd think about where you would sleep on the bed, and if you would enjoy the cheese out of the bottom of the leftover pasta container.
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Scout, you've been my other half for almost 6 years and for the last 8 months you weren't there and I felt your ghost but longer for your soft fur, inquisitive stares, and old soul magic.
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I may have been "home" in North America for two weeks, but I'm truly home now with you.
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Thanks for remembering me, thanks for loving me.